Saturday, March 5, 2011

Easier Said than Learned

Of all my natural-born gifts and tendencies, a love of discipline is not one of them. I love to dream, envision, plan, coordinate, organize, arrange, involve, get supplied and informed….and then I set about putting it all into action. For a day or two. Maybe even three or five. Beyond that, takes a constitution that isn’t part of my human nature. For all my love of setting up new routines, new schedules and new plans for development, my follow-through, bluntly-speaking, sucks.

Discipline is as foreign to me as organization is to my “absent-minded-professor” son. He is constantly being called on the carpet by his elementary school teachers for losing, forgetting, and misplacing homework assignments. I tell him that we are all here to learn some things, and that organization is on his Big Clipboard of Assignments ~ and, for that, he should consider himself lucky. Surely tackling the discipline of putting things in proper places, writing down complete instructions for assignments, and remembering to take completed work, surely all of that is all easier than it is for the kids who struggle with the actual learning. I remind him that there are kids who sit through class after class, not having a glimmer of an idea of what the teacher is talking about. I tell him he’s lucky that he learns easily, and that, using his gifts, learning organization can be easy for him.

But am I being fair? I am blessed to be a quick learner, too, and yet all my gifts have not made it any easier for me to “learn discipline.” This realization lands on me with an existential thud. If he struggles with organization the way I’ve struggled with discipline, then he may yet have a long row yet to hoe. Rather than encouraging him with my “surely it’s easier” dissertation, have I been making him feel worse about not yet achieving that which may take him fifty years to learn?

Thinking over the goals I’ve achieved and what disciplines that I have successfully instilled, I realize that I’m most likely to stay with something with I have a workout buddy, a study group or at least someone to whom I report. I wanted to blog weekly since this blog started back in (sheesh, was it really?) 2008. I’ve honored that intention since committing to a blogging workout partner in January of this year. Now that that the habit is established, it’s easy to do. I feel something is missing when I don’t post something here before Saturday (as in this week!).

I have intended a daily practice of meditation since my parents first took me to a Transcendental Meditation guru in the early 70s ~ perhaps thirty years ago. And yet I only became committed to my daily meditation practice after I began the Modern Day Priestess training in 2009, when it was assigned as ‘homework’ and I was training with a group of initiates.

So it occurs to me now that I could ask Cameron’s teacher if there is another student in his class who forgets, misplaces, and loses his or her homework? Perhaps they can work together, challenge each other, to see who can get completed homework assignments to school on time. Maybe we could even start a support group on campus for the Chronically Disorganizeds. Okay, strike the latter, but I have come to this realization: We are here to learn things, and we learn better when we learn together. Sounds simple enough, and yet it took ME fifty years to figure that out. Perhaps I can save Cameron a few decades. If only he will listen….

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